I want to write
about this "pump head". This is what the heart surgeons call it. It
happened to me after my 4 bypass heart surgery. As I sit here this morning quivering inside my body and my mind racing as it most always does I want to write more about this.
I have found that doctors and pharmacist have not heard about this. I am finding doctors and pharmacists are interested in what I am telling them about what I am going through after the heart surgery.
They tell me they are sorry I am going through this but they have no answers as what to do about it. It seems all who have had this happen to them (us) are just here with no answers yet we still face this daily.
As
a Christian I trust God with every heart beat. It has been and will be
God that gets me through all this. Even if I have to go through the rest of my life living with this "pump head thing" I can and will trust God. As God knows the outcome of each of us we can turn to God asking his help.
God has told us to keep seeking, keep knocking and to keep asking.
Right
now my mind wants to go blank as I try to remember Scripture or to
remember other things. This is part of the after heart surgery that we face. When I say we I mean all who face this after heart surgery.
I
am so compulsive it's hard to get through a day. Things I never went
through are here and seem to worsen each day. I want to do things like
clean house, go visit people, etc. But to be around most people . . . I can not
stand to be around them. Because they talk loud or they want to go on and on about things that do not matter.
Its
so hard to explain unless you are going through this. I want to tell
people about this pump head but they look at me like I am crazy. This is because they have no clue what I am going through.
I
am grateful that I am not going through a disease like cancer. But
this brain thing is over whelming as I do not know what to do from
second to second.
At
the end of every day I can thank God for getting me through this as I
know I had nothing to do with my getting through each 24/7 day. I pray
asking God`s help and it is God that sends me his help and I know it is God and prayers of other believers that help me.
I
know another lady, Cathy, who faces this also. She has had many
surgeries and she told me she knows she is going through this also. So
its not just heart
surgery that might cause this. Any time your brain is damaged from
after surgeries you will face this with your brain being damaged.
Pray for all people who are facing this brain thing that we can do nothing about.
If you had any surgery where you were under for hours you probably have a brain injury also. Trust God. He is our answer.
Praise you Jehovah Rophe the Lord that heals us.
Mary
